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Three Questions Egg Donors Are Tired of Being Asked

For some egg donors, a supportive and encouraging group of family members and friends can make the difference between entering a donation cycle with confidence and feeling as if you made the wrong decision. Although more people are aware of egg donation than ever before, the concept remains just that -- a concept -- for those who are not familiar with the fertility community. As a result, egg donors can face unpleasant, difficult or even invasive questions from their most well-meaning family members and friends. To put it simply, a lack of education can turn a normal conversation into a source of stress.

Egg Donor America completely understands that prospective, current and former egg donors alike wish to avoid discussing their decision to donate because they are asked such inappropriate questions. Below, we’ve outlined the top three questions egg donors are tired of being asked, why they’re invasive and provided some resources so you do not need to ask those questions of an egg donor.

1. “How much are you getting paid?”
Discussing any type of compensation is a no-go zone in a professional setting, but for some reason, curiosity rules over politeness when third-party reproductive services are brought up. Suddenly, the specifics of any financial gain from donating eggs is OK to inquire about. What the egg donor reveals and how much information she provides is entirely up to her, but please keep in mind that a simple “I’d rather not get into the specifics” is an absolutely acceptable answer. Her decision to donate is complex and cannot be boiled down to a number.

2. “Aren’t you worried if the donation will hurt?”
Asking a donor if she is worried about pain inadvertently insinuates that she should be, even if a physician has already allayed her concerns. The entire egg donation process is carefully overseen by the physician of her choice. The doctors trained in egg retrieval understand the side effects donors can experience and can help donors prepare for any potential risks. During the actual retrieval procedure, anesthesia is used to help ensure optimal comfort for donors. Most donors return to normal activities one to two days after the procedure.

3. “Won’t it be weird to have a baby out there that is yours?”
The question of whether the child is the donor’s or not is unkind, as it undermines the decision-making of those who have committed their time and effort to egg donation. Donors accepted into an egg donation program are carefully screened to ensure they understand and accept the psychological aspects of egg donation. Egg donors are completely aware that any child that results from their donation will be born to a loving, deserving family who could not have had a baby without their help.

If you would like to learn more about the donor requirements at Egg Donor America, please visit here.

If you would like to learn more about egg donation, please visit our FAQ page.

Related Topics: Egg Donor Compensation, Become an Egg Donor, Egg Donor Risk