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How to Talk About Being an Egg Donor

There’s a chance that the family and friends of a number of egg donors are entirely unfamiliar with the donation process. They may only have a passing knowledge of egg donation as a method of helping those in need of donated eggs grow their families, but in terms of how things actually work and the role of the donor, there may be a wide gap where information has been filled with assumptions, misconceptions, even some myths. This can be a bit frustrating for donors seeking support for their decision, it may feel a bit overwhelming to have these conversations with those you trust. At Egg Donor America, we wanted to help keep conversations about being an egg donor easy, whenever possible.

A Few Things to Keep in Mind

The decision to reveal that you are an egg donor or will be an egg donor is entirely up to you. You do not have to share this information with anyone you’d rather not, egg donation is personal, medical, and not for public consumption if the donor prefers to keep it to themselves. If there are people you trust and feel comfortable talking to about being an egg donor, of course, we hope you receive all of the support you desire.

Egg donation carries a lot of misconceptions about the donation process, compensation, and your role as an anonymous donor. You may encounter some pretty “out there” questions, like:

  • How much money are you getting exactly?
  • Will you get to meet the baby? Do you want to meet the baby?
  • What happens if donating your eggs hurts your fertility? (it doesn’t, by the way)
  • But what if you can’t have all the babies you want because you donated your eggs?
  • Isn’t egg donation going to interfere with your life?

The above questions are largely rooted in myths, or are simply within the bounds of rudeness. While educating those you speak to about egg donation can feel like a big lift at times, ultimately it will mean less intrusive questions and better support.

There are high quality, authoritative resources you can point family and friends to when needed. RESOLVE, The National Infertility Association offers information about egg donation and why infertile and LGBTQ+ couples seek third-party reproduction. The Egg Donor America blog is also a worthwhile resource, with years of entries dedicated to growing families and egg donors.